Naomi loves everything pink.
One day she wore pink flip flops with pink shinny stuff on the strings. My eyes were unpleasantly caught by the scene. First, we (as told by people when I was interviewed for the job) are not supposed to wear in such a casual way. Second, you know, if I don't have a great fondness for you, please don't wear anything pink to increase my negative thoughts of you.
I can't explain this. I don't have conscious access to this fundamental trait of myself. It is like why I can't explain why I like the taste of taro. It is like why Liu can't explain why he can't endure the taste of carrots. It is like why Naomi can't explain why she likes pink so much (she would say this sentence in a particular NY/NJ accent on the word "so" while rolling her eyes upward).
Kerline is the new girl, whom I like a lot. She drove me back home yesterday. That's not the only reason I like her. She dislikes pink probably as much as I do.
On the way back to my place, she was complaining about her own obsession in organizing things to an extreme that she may complicate an easy task by parsing it into too many sub-steps. I half-joked that this may be why she is a graduate student.
The more I think about it, the more I am convinced.
Blue is Kerline's favorite color. Kerline is calm and good at trouble-shooting. Detail-oriented is the major reason I gave her a "welcome" sign to join the lab and to be my pal.
Naomi is going to a medical school. She likes pink.
Kim and Dr. Anna are medical doctors. They like pink.
Kerline and other female graduate students such as Ching, Rose, and Teresa like blue.
Zabeth and I were graduate students. We like blue.
Recently I like green more and more. Green is becoming my new blue. Krissy is going to graduate school. She likes green.
See? There are two types of girls. One likes pink. One dislikes pink and most likely likes blue. Pink girls tend to become medical doctors. Blue/green girls tend to become doctors.
"Why is the color pink the sign for feminine?" Kerline asked. I shrugged. Honestly, I didn't know.
I googled it. The answer made me smile. Long before our parents or grandparents, blue is a girl color while pink is for boys. Here are two paragraphs of the google answer.
"At one point pink was considered more of a boy's color, (as a watered-down red, which is a fierce color) and blue was more for girls. The associate of pink with bold, dramatic red clearly affected its use for boys. An American newspaper in 1914 advised mothers, "If you like the color note on the little one's garments, use pink for the boy and blue for the girl, if you are a follower of convention." [The Sunday Sentinal, March 29, 1914.]
"There has been a great diversity of opinion on the subject, but the generally accepted rule is pink for the boy and blue for the girl. The reason is that pink being a more decided and stronger color is more suitable for the boy, while blue, which is more delicate and dainty, is prettier for the girl." [Ladies Home Journal, June, 1918]
- Gender Specific Colors
It actually matches a Chinese saying by coincident. The saying is "red men and green women", meaning people in this mundane world as men in red and women in green.
That is, my innate fondness actually is consistent with the old social norm. But who decided that pink was more decided and blue was delicate and dainty?
Some people perceive sounds when they see color. It is an atypical cross-talk between two perception systems, called synesthesia. Did the people who made the social association between color and gender perceive something else than color when they saw color? Why can't I perceive delicacy or decisiveness in blue or pink? They must have had an extraordinary perception system.
"When a man wears a pink shirt, he would say it's because he feels secure with his masculinity." Kerline said.
"If they are so secure, why don't they wear skirts and heels?" I said.
Kerline laughed and said that I was funny. This was not the first time when she said I was funny. I began to wonder whether I was really funny or she didn't know how to respond.
Genderization is one of the many ways to organize a society. We humans like to categorize things so that things can be simplified so that things can be easier to understand. Labeling is to de-complicate a person into an "average" of a group. Well... if you have studied statistics, there is hardly an average person or a data point actually at the average. Labeling helps us to understand because our mind is organized in schemas. However, this often blinds us from a true data point or the fact that each person is unique, and we stereotype a person.
Therefore, because woman = pink, breast cancer = pink ribbon. Kerline declined to wear the breast cancer ribbon. I would do the same. To be fair, I don't wear any ribbons or wrist bands.
Kerline went to buy a wallet. She wanted to get a man wallet because a woman wallet tends to be big and fat. She couldn't find one man wallet meeting her need, however. She wanted a zipped pocket within a man wallet. Obviously, a man wallet does not include the function of carrying coins. She asked a man in the store. The man said only girls need a coin pocket with a wallet. Men put coins in their pant pockets.
She frowned and gave in and went to the woman department to get a smallest wallet, of course with a zipped pockets for coins.
"How annoying! We women wear more fitted and usually don't have pants pockets. We have to do our hair and makeup before going out. Sometimes I really feel it's so unfair."
I nodded and didn't know how to respond. Yeah.. it's annoying. But I prefer to have a wallet for coins instead of putting them in my pockets if I had pockets in all my pants and skirts. And I only spend 10 minutes at most for my hair and my face every morning. I believe many guys spend more than 10 minutes.
Kerline's new wallet is not pink. She is not less feminine than a girl with a pink purse.
If a guy carries a pink wallet, is he less masculine? I can't answer this question. But I know I won't be able to befriend with him because a pink wallet simply gives me goose bumps no matter the gender of its owner.
Metrosexual guys are my favorite (if they don't carry a pink wallet). They care about their appearance as an expression of showing respect to themselves and others around them (this is why I shower and dress up everyday). When they wear a pink T-shirt, I don't see them gay. Not all gay guys like pink. Metrosexuals are just happy with who they are and what color they like. Pink is a color, not a color for girls. They are masculine and confident and neat, which is very sexy. If they have long legs, short neat hair, long fingers with clean nails, .... wow.... sometimes I feel like a gay guy. But I don't like skinny men. Skinny men usually don't have butts that I like. Many women get expressively feminine as in tight dresses, high heels, or any accessories to emphasize their female body images. I think men should do the same: to emphasize how proud you are to have a male body.
This coming winter I hope to see more guys walking in Manhattan with long boots. Not just men like to see women with beautiful long legs. Women value long-legged men too.
As to the color pink, it's ok. It's not my birthday today. You're allowed to wear pink, men or women, to be around me.
